So, here's the thing....

There just really hasn't been too much happening around here. I mean, I have all these projects that are half done that I just can't get motivated or find the time to finish.

I have two daughters that I adore who are becoming social butterflies that keep me busy busy busy on the weekends.  I have decided that I really need to enjoy the next 10 years and take a step back and realize that my babies will soon be grown women themselves. I need to take advantage of  every moment that I can.  This is hard - I work full time, with an hour commute each way and very long days.  Weekends are a frenzy of house cleaning, laundry, dish washing, grocery shopping, family time, fun time, friend time -   seriously.  Who can fit all that into 48 hours? 

Not to mention  - I have a shit ton of projects and creative stuff coming out of my ears that I can't get to and that frustrates me to no end.

But, I have been exercising a lot more - which is giving me a lot more energy - and also provides me with some alone time where I can be by myself with my thoughts.  I work out a lot of stuff on those runs.

All that being said, I want to write down what I hope to accomplish in the next month or so- I hope it'll make me accountable.  (Hope springs eternal...)

1.  Run at least 5 times a week - three of those times being early  morning treadmill runs.  Which I hate.  But I have another race coming up in May and I want to be ready.
2.  Try to lose about 5 pounds.  I'm uncomfortable in my skin right now.
3.  Pick out material for the couch in the sitting room and find an upholsterer.  I just can't make a decision here.  But it's gone on long enough.
4.  Get the pictures I have had for 6 months now hung on the walls in the sitting room.  This is more work than it sounds like.  I'll let you know why when I'm done.
5.  Rework our budget.  We've done a few things to hopefully give us some extra cash.  We will both be needing new cars in the next few years and I'd like to save up a sizable down payment.  Because cars are crazy expensive.
6. Do something fun with the girls at least once a week.
7. Snuggle with my babies before bed at least a few times a week.  I love those snuggles, where we all climb in my bed and hunker down under the big down comforter and giggle and cuddle up together.

I think that's enough for a month, don't you? Stay tuned to see how I do....

And after reading this post I realize I'm a hot mess - I am all OVER the place.

Can you get ADD at the age of 41? 

12

Valentines’ Day of the year 2000

That’s the day I first became a mother.

My very own Snow White was born, with porcelain skin, a head full of dark hair and perfect little red rose lips.

Hard to believe she’s 12 now.  Trust me when I say, I blinked and a decade flew by….

I remember everything about the day she was born.

I remember thinking that I wasn’t ready yet. 

I remember the doctor telling me that it was happening, whether it was three weeks early or not.

I remember the car ride from the doctor to the hospital.

I remember calling Brian’s office from the car.

I remember his co-worker answering – and then dropping the phone and yelling for Brian as he ran across the shop looking for him upon hearing me say “I need Brian – It’s time!”

I remember being in the hospital and hoping that all the grandparents would make it in time to catch a glimpse of their first grandbaby as soon as she was born.

I remember thinking that it was all happening so fast that it was surreal. 

I remember not being scared.

I remember seeing Brian’s excited eyes above the mask he had to wear in the delivery room as they began the surgery.

I remember waiting and waiting and waiting for that first cry.

I remember feeling such relief upon hearing it.

I remember crying when I heard that we had a daughter – and that she was perfect.

I remember telling Brian to leave me and go with the baby – nothing else mattered now but her.

I remember the feeling I had when they first placed her in my arms  - and it is indescribable.

I remember looking at the tears in my parent’s eyes and – for the first time – understanding.

I remember thinking that everything had now changed forever, in a good way.

I remember thinking “Why didn’t anyone tell me how fast and how much I would love this child?”

The years that have gone by since that beautiful day have brought us some amazing memories of our Olivia Leigh, but those few hours before and after her birth are ingrained in my mind with such detail and clarity that they could have happened yesterday.   I suspect that will be the case for the rest of my life and that the births of my daughters will be the last memories I relive before I die.

As the years go by, she becomes more independent and chafes at the parental bonds I tenuously still hold.  We bicker, we yell, we say things we regret…she is, in many respects, a smaller version of me.  

She hates to hear that.  

And I understand. 

I’m sure we have some very difficult years ahead of us as we march into the teenage years.  

But all I have to do is think back to February 14, 2000, and all the frustration and anger fades and all I want to do is grab her and hold her and hug her and kiss her and tell her how much I love her.

Happy Birthday my beautiful baby girl. 

I love you more than the moon and the stars.  

And I always will.

Hot Damn!

Look ma!!

No more dish pan hands!

On Friday our new dishwasher was delivered. 

I'd love to tell you the make, the model and all that jazz...

But, alas..... I really have no freakin' clue off the top of my head and I'm too lazy to get up and dig out the paperwork. 

I CAN tell you that it's black, it's a GE, it's a tall tub, and it cleans like a mo-fo.

And we got a HELL of a deal on it. 

This was definitely one of those "it's not what you know, it's who you know" times.

  

Seriously.  

Someday I'll tell you all about it.  But right now, let's look at what happened here this weekend!

Taking out old Faithful. 

Good bye dear Maytag, circa 1995, who served us (and Judi & Ted) well. 

Now, I should tell you that we have copper pipes.  Copper pipes that tend to be very persnickety and like to get little pin holes in them if you look at them the wrong way.

Baxter - saying goodbye....

Brian was really nervous about taking the dishwasher out because, well, we just weren't sure how the pipes would react.

Would they rebel and spew everywhere to show their displeasure or would they be pleased to serve this new King?  

(Damn - can you tell I'm reading Game of Thrones?)

We had a plumber on stand by - just in case.

Turns out, removal and installation went off without a hitch and within 2 hours I was loading that beautiful bad boy up and turning him on...

Hello Lover....

Most of my appliances are white.  But, I chose black so that it wouldn't stand out like a sore thumb from our dark cabinets.  It's actually not as noticeable as I thought it would be.

Score one for me.

And I have opened it in the middle of a cycle at least ten times - just to make sure it was actually running.  

That's how quiet it is. 

 I pretty much love it.

Although I just looked at this picture and realized that I'm going to be constantly cleaning the front, so it stays nice and shiny.