Monday, March 23, 2009


So remember when I forgot to renew Brian’s tags and he got a ticket? Well, when MY registration renewal came in the mail in January, Brian said to me – “Ha! Bet you won’t forget to renew YOUR tags, will you?” Much hilarity ensued as we both fell to floor in fits of laughter remembering how my neglect in paying the bill resulted in much embarrassment for Brian, another bill for me to pay in the form of a ticket, and me getting teased for the next 20 years over my mistake….Oh yeah. It was funny. Funny guy, my husband.

On February 26’th, I remembered that I had, indeed, forgotten to renew my tags which would expire the following day. No matter, I simply went on line, renewed the tags, printed out a temporary registration, taped it to my back window and smugly waited for the stickers to come in the mail. Brian would never know that I had almost forgotten. Ha!

The stickers and registration arrived just a few days later and I put the envelope on the kitchen counter, telling myself that I would put the sticker on in the next day or so - when it wasn’t raining, when it was a little warmer – you know, basically when I wasn’t being a lazy ass who simply didn’t feel like going downstairs, cleaning the license plate and slapping the freaking sticker on the tag.

Yesterday, as Brian and I were cleaning out drawers, filing old bills (well, Brian did that, I just pulled all the crap out for him to go through) I suddenly realized that I hadn’t seen the stickers for my tags anywhere…..and that my temporary registration had expired the week before…..and I was driving around on dead tags….crap…..

I frantically looked all through the kitchen and casually asked Brian if he had seen the envelope “No big deal or anything – I just thought, you know, I’d go put the stickers on now - I have plenty of time so really if it’s not here it’s no big deal.” He looked at me and said “Honey, did you lose the stickers?” Of course not! I haughtily replied. They were here somewhere. I’m sure I put them in my car or something. No worries.

I searched again – everywhere upstairs I could possibly think of, with Brian sitting at the kitchen table shaking his head, sighing and saying “I can’t believe you don’t know where they are. You should have put them on the car right away. This is what happens when you leave stuff lying around”. Then he grins at me……he KNOWS how much it pisses me off when he talks to me like I’m a naughty 7 year old who left her bike in the driveway to get run over. So, I “gently” punched him in the arm and went downstairs to search through my car.

Not there. I pulled out everything, looked under the seats, and would have looked under the hood if I thought there was even the remotest chance of my registration stickers being there. Now what? Do they even GIVE you replacement stickers? And what was I going to tell them? “I need a new registration renewal and stickers for my tags because I – a college educated, very practical, reasonably intelligent adult woman – had lost them”? The only thing that would make my humiliation even worse would be if Brian went to the MVA with me and watched this all go down…..

I pondered this as I leaned against the trunk of my car. I was so lost in thought that I didn’t realize until I stared at the back window for several minutes that the Temporary Registration that I had taped to it was no longer there. GREAT! And now I’ve lost that!

And that’s when the light bulb went off.

I leaned over to look at my tags.

And found the missing stickers.

SOMEONE had put those stickers on my license plate. Someone put those stickers on God only knows when without telling me. Someone who had been teasing me for the past hour….while wearing that shit eating grin of his……

I screamed his name from the garage “BRIAN!!!!!!”

I can still hear him laughing at me.

Sunday, March 22, 2009

What a week!

Olivia had her standardized testing all this week for third grade. She was sooooo stressed about it, the poor thing. It's so sad that, at 8 and 9 years old, they have that much pressure on them. Added to that she came down with pink eye on Tuesday.

OK - here's where I'm going to piss some people off....

She woke up Tuesday morning and her right eye was glassy and red. I figured she might have pink eye and as I debated with myself out loud about what to do, she began to get hysterical about having to miss her testing, thinking she was going to fail. After I assured her that wasn't case, I made the decision to send her to school until 11;30 - so she could at least finish her her test before I pulled her out. Add to this the fact that I had to FIND someone to get her from the school, and then get her to Brian's work so he could take her to the doctor, and then get her back to mom's afterwards, and I was not in a good mood by about 7:30 a.m.

Why didn't I just take the day off you ask? Good question. I had a long standing doctor appointment the next day that I knew would take all morning, thereby causing me to miss work. I also knew that I couldn't send Liv to school on Wednesday once they realized she had pink eye, so I'd miss work completely. I figured I'd take my chances and hope that I didn't have to miss two days in a row. Brian had a crazy week and was shorthanded, so he couldn't miss a day of work either. And we realized there was about a 90% chance that Sydney would get pink eye within the next few days, so we'd have to take time off again.
I put her on the bus, and raced to work, calling the doctor on the way and making an afternoon appointment.

I got a call from the school nurse at about 9:30 a.m. - Come get her, NOW - and don't bring her back until she's been on antibiotics 24 hours.

So, she missed her testing anyway, and the entire office staff will most certainly be giving me the stink eye next time they see me. "There's the mother who sent her daughter to school knowing she had pink eye. Disgraceful!"

Yup, Mother of the Year, right here. Just waitin' for my award to be delivered.

After much scrambling, my friend picked her up at school since I'm a good 45 minutes away , and then delivered her to Brian at the doctor's office a few hours later.

By evening, it was in both eyes...

Poor Baby!!

And then we have Sydney, whose front tooth has been loose


She just wouldn't let us near it or pull it out herself. My friends' daughter Emma (who's like another child of my own) was here over the weekend.

Emma clearly thought it was ridiculous that the tooth was still hanging on, so she reached into Sydney's mouth .......

....and pulled the tooth right out.

I was so stunned I didn't quite know what to say.

Maybe Emma's going to be a dentist?

After the tooth extraction, we took some pictures to distract Sydney....

I think I'm in love with this picture. Sydney took it....

Sweet Dreams...

Sunday, March 15, 2009

We'll be back right after this short break!

Hey there everyone! Big mid-term project due this week involving determining the viability of a fictitious industrial building here in the great state of Maryland - cash flows, rental amounts, rollover probabilities, retention rates, capital expenses, escalation rates - oh, what a wonderful few weeks it's been......

But after Wednesday - no homework for a whole week! Can I get an "A-MEN?"

I'll see you after Wednesday - wish me luck =)

Sunday, March 8, 2009

A day in the life...

OK, well, how about an HOUR in the life?

Weekday mornings are the WORST around here. I mean, really BAD. Brian gets up and leaves the house around 7:15 a.m. or so and the girls don't catch the bus until around 8:05-8:10. Now, keep in mind my girls aren't really "morning" people. Not during the week anyway (much like their mommy).

This is our story....

6:45 Brian wakes me up. Brian wakes up the girls.
6:55 Brian wakes me up again. Brian wakes up the girls again.
7:05 Brian threatens to pull the covers off and roll my lazy ass out of bed if I don't get up. The real motivation comes when he tells me he won't leave me any coffee unless I get up. NOW.
7:10 Begin calling for the girls to come down and get their breakfast.
7:12 Brian calls up to the girls that he's leaving.
7:13 What sounds like a herd of elephants comes bounding down the stairs and runs to the window to wave good bye to daddy.
7:14 The girls begin fighting over the prime spot at the window. I'm on my second cup of coffee.
7:15 Sydney cries because daddy didn't wave to her. He did, however, wave to her sister who happened to be standing right next to her at the window. Go figure.
7:16 Breakfast is served. I usually make a nice, hot breakfast of homemade pancakes or scrambled eggs with toast and juice. I do this while standing in the kitchen in my apron wearing my pearls and a sunny smile.
7:16 In the real world, breakfast is served. Pop-Tarts or cereal - with milk, if we have it.
7:18 I explain to Sydney that yes, they are packing their lunch today, because I am not made of money.
7:19 I explain to Olivia that No, I don't care whether she eats what I pack her or not, she's not buying lunch.
7:21 I finish packing lunches.
7:22 I begin telling the girls to get a move on and finish up soon.
7:23 I tell the girls that I'm going to get a shower and they better be done with breakfast, and be dressed when I get out.
7:24 I pick out their clothes for the day and hop in the shower.
7:26 I hear a huge "THUMP" somewhere. I have soap in my hair and no one's screaming. So I rinse.
7:27 Sydney comes into the bathroom to ask whether her orange flip flops will match the jeans and sweater I have picked out. I tell her I don't think so since it's only 40 degrees outside and since when is she allowed to wear flip flops to school in ANY weather?
7:27 The bathroom door slams and Sydney stomps away yelling about how unfair her life is.
7:28 Liv comes into the bathroom to scream about how disgusting her sister is and how Sydney got toothpaste all over the place and made a huge mess and Olivia just can't be around her because she is GROSS. Sydney screams in the background that she did it on "accident".
7:28 The bathroom door slams again.
7:29 Sydney comes into the bathroom to tell me that Olivia hit/kicked/slapped/pinched her.
7:29 The bathroom door slams again.
7:30 I hear the girls screaming at each other and a lot of banging.
7:31 I now have a headache. Have you ever tried to yell at your children who were two rooms away while you were in the shower? Very loud. Not good for the ears - or the head.
7:32 I'm out of the shower. I discover the girls aren't dressed, their teeth aren't brushed and they are still arguing.
7:33 I drip into the hallway and tell Sydney to finish brushing her teeth and tell Liv to get dressed.
7:34 There are several comments shouted from the bathroom to Liv's room and vice-versa, which are not very nice.
7:35 I go back into the hallway and tell Sydney to now go get dressed and Liv to now go brush her teeth.
7:37 Sydney has decided she doesn't like the shirt I picked out and has ventured to the laundry room to dig through the baskets for something that suits her fancy.
7:38 Olivia is complaining that she doesn't have ANY clothes and she can't wear what I picked out because everyone will laugh at her. She can't explain why.
7:39 A new outfit for Olivia is chosen and she finally gets dressed.
7:41 I yell for the girls to grab whatever they want in their hair and bring a brush.
7:42 Olivia shows up with my hairbrush, which she got from my purse. I am still not dressed and my hair has only been dried half way.
7:43 Olivia's hair is done. She doesn't like it and proceeds to take it out.
7:44 I call for Sydney again.
7:45 I'm now halfway dressed. But I can't find my shoes.
7:47 Sydney shows up. In her underwear. She can't find the shirt she's been looking for. I try to count to ten. I make it to six before I start yelling. Sydney runs from the room to get dressed in what I picked out.
7:48 Sydney is now dressed.

(are you exhausted yet?)

7:49 Sydney has disappeared again to go get the barrette with the kitty cat on it that she wants to wear in her hair. Olivia begins the morning countdown by telling me that we only have 15 minutes until the bus comes. She will continue this countdown every minute until we get in the car.
7:50 I ask Liv to please go let the dogs out. She rolls her eyes and sighs heavily and complains that she ALWAYS has to let the dogs out. I tell her to get over it.
7:53 I go downstairs and find Sydney in the downstairs bathroom riffling through the drawers looking for her barrette and singing to herself in the mirror. This time I only make it to four.
7:54 Sydney's hair is hair is done and she is crying. I probably shouldn't do their hair when I'm frustrated.
7:55 I find my shoes. But the girls can't find theirs. Olivia reminds me that we now only have ten minutes until the bus comes. I remind her that her hair still isn't done.
7:56 I give the girls 2 seconds to get shoes on. ANY shoes.
7:57 Sydney comes down in her orange flip flops. I don't even bother to count.
7:58 Sydney has gone back upstairs to get real shoes. Olivia is in the bathroom re-doing her hair.
7:59 Olivia comes out of the bathroom and I take one look at her and tell her there is NO WAY she's going to school with her hair like that. She stomps off to try again.
8:01 Olivia begins to panic because her hair isn't done, which means she has to start over.
8:02 I call to Sydney to let the dogs in. She apparently feels that she has to do EVERYTHING for me and that I need to start doing things myself.
8:03 Olivia's hair is now done and acceptable and she begins telling me that if we don't hurry up, we'll miss the bus. The irony is lost on her.
8:05 We jump in the car and race up the road to the bus stop, just in time to see the bus pull up - on a good day.
9:00 I get to work and walk into my office and discover, upon looking in the mirror, that I have no make-up on.

Tuesday, March 3, 2009

The Bath Aftermath

Cue spooky music......

Don't go in there!!





ree! ree! reee! reee!


When comes to making messes in the bathtub, Norman Bates has got NOTHIN' on my girls.

The room in which we live....

The family room.
Since the color doesn't convey well on film, I thought I'd show you a few "swatches" of the paint colors...
My pants.

The creamy color (please direct your attention to the left pants leg) is on the wall opposite the windows. The light comes in and reflects off the light color and makes the room feel brighter.

In the evening.....

The darker color (which looked like chocolate milk when I picked it out - see right pants leg above) is on the wall where the two big windows are located. It's nice and warm and cozy.

This coffee table was purchased last summer, but we have had the TV on it since then. We finally found a piece of furniture we liked.

So we are now able to use the coffee table as it was intended....

To hold my morning coffee!

I'm still not quite done in here. I need to bring a more little color to the room....Maybe some new window treatments?


Imagine the room with a thick crown molding, some window treatments with just a hint of a nice deep red.....yum......

And here we have a bracelet Liv made for me.

Lots of hearts for lots of love. I love my girls.